Backstreet Boys Karate, Emma Roberts Gets Physical, & Top Ways To Beat The Heat
Posted 7/17/2013 3:00:00 PM

A video of a middle-aged white dude doing KARATE to a terrible karaoke version of the Backstreet Boys song "Everybody" is starting to make the rounds online.

It's one of those bad music videos you used to be able to make at shopping malls . . . where you're singing along in front of a green-screen.

According to the YouTube description, it's from 1999, and it was made at an amusement park called Canada's Wonderland.

 

We don't know why this is only coming out now, but EMMA ROBERTS was arrested on July 7th for beating up her boyfriend, actor EVAN PETERS.

Police arrived at their hotel room in Montreal after someone reported an altercation between a man and a woman. Peters had a bloody nose, and he was also BITTEN. (There's no word where.)

Emma was taken into custody, but she was released a few hours later because Peters didn't want charges pressed.

According to TMZ, a "source" says Emma and Evan were BOTH getting physical with each other, but SHE was arrested because he had obvious physical injuries.

Emma's rep says, quote, "It was an unfortunate incident and misunderstanding. Ms. Roberts was released after questioning and the couple are working together to move past it." Emma is 22 . . . Evan is 26.

Evan has been on both seasons of "American Horror Story" . . . and Emma is supposed to join him in the cast of the upcoming third season.

With much of the country experiencing a heat wave, we want to help you keep cool with the Top Ways to Beat the Heat.

If it gets too hot, rub an ice cube on your body. Especially if you're a woman. And you let me watch.

If you need to do something physically demanding in the heat, make your kids do it. That's what you had them for.

When exercising, be sure to drink the proper amount of . . . ah, screw it. Like your chubby ass will ever exercise.

Seek out a cool, dark room. Unless it's a theater showing "Grown Ups 2".

Trust me, you'd rather die from the heat. Keep the ball away from LeBron James.

Sorry, that's from the top ways to beat the MIAMI Heat. If you live in New York City, enjoy a refreshing 15.9 ounce soda.

Ask a fireman to turn on a fire hydrant. He won't do it, but at least you got to talk to a fireman.

There's something sad about watching people beg for Twitter followers. There's something SURREAL about watching the POPE do it. According to a report by the British newspaper "The Guardian", the Vatican really wants people to follow POPE FRANCIS on Twitter during Catholic World Youth Day . . . which is a weeklong event in Rio from July 23rd to 28th.

They're saying if you follow the Pope on Twitter that week, the Vatican is offering something called "indulgences."

When the Pope gives someone an indulgence, it reduces the amount of time they spend in purgatory after they die, before they make their trip to the afterlife. In other words, if you follow the Pope on Twitter . . . he'll FAST TRACK your path to HEAVEN.

And don't worry, he won't fast-track your path to hell. In Catholic doctrine, no one goes from purgatory to hell. If you get to purgatory at all, sooner or later you end up in heaven.

The Pope's Twitter account is @Pontifex. He currently has about 2.7 million followers.

Or you could follow ME @MaxOnMovies – you won’t get to heaven any faster but you’ll have a lot of fun on Earth.

Posted By: Max Foizey  

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  1. AnnieFrey (Author) posted on 07/18/2013 11:40 AM
    Oh my.
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