Sawing Off Your Hands For Insurance Money, Offensive Stick Figures, & The Best Things About Being Picked in the NFL Draft
Posted 4/29/2013 3:00:00 PM

If you’re going to make a quilt….don’t use a black stick figure. You may offend a councilwoman in Virginia. - ABC13

Is there ANY woman who fantasizes about her boyfriend or husband slipping into a thong, negligee, and lace cami? Is there any woman in the WORLD who would be turned on by that? There's a company in Australia that's hoping the answer is yes.

They're called HommeMystere, and they just released a line of LINGERIE FOR MEN. But they didn't make ANY effort to give the lingerie a masculine twist . . . other than making it in men's sizes. It's mostly pink. It contains lace and bows and hearts. It includes teddies, camisoles, thongs, negligees . . . and even padded man-bras.

The company is hoping this CHANGES the way men look at underwear. They believe men who try their product will find, quote, "comfortable men's panties that really do fit, bra straps that don't fall off the shoulder, [and] teddies that don't ride up halfway through the night."

The products cost around $25 for a pair of men's panties, $32 for a men's bra, and $50 for men's lingerie. If you want this stuff, you can buy it at

Speakgin of manly men, 244 college players just had their dreams come true by being drafted into the NFL over the weekend. Let's see why it's so awesome. Here are the Best Things About Being Picked in the NFL Draft.

If you're drafted by Oakland, heavily tattooed cholos will start wearing your jersey when they commit felonies.

If you were picked by Cleveland . . . nothing. You're never heat-pasteurized. Sorry.

That's a great thing about being a Miller Genuine Draft.

It's a great opportunity to break out your green-and-purple pinstriped triple-breasted suit. Knowing you'll probably immediately get more playing time than Tim Tebow.

You don't have to go out in the world and pretend you learned stuff in college.

The peace that comes with knowing you'll get the highest-quality care during your "concussion years".

Shots with Al Michaels!

There's a one in 33 chance you won't wind up with the Jacksonville Jaguars.

From here on out, your chances of beating a murder rap increase by 500%.

By law, you'll get to date at least one reality TV star.

Knowing your finances are set for life. Right, Vince Young?

You get the pleasure of destroying your body for half of what baseball players make.

Speaking of the draft I can’t wait to get my hands on a shirt or hat with the new Miami Dolphins logo on it. Maybe I can have Kmart ship it to me, along with some pants.

You've got to admire THIS much commitment to an insurance fraud scheme. Most people just fake a little neck pain or something. Not these guys. In Spain, TWO men were busted trying to get big insurance settlements . . . by SAWING OFF THEIR OWN HANDS.

The two cases were unconnected, but both guys had similar plans. One guy used a CHAINSAW to chop off one of his hands. He claimed he lost the hand in a car accident, and was looking at a $3.1 million settlement . . . until investigators found the cut was TOO CLEAN for a car crash and busted him. The other guy went with a circular saw.

He chopped off his ENTIRE LOWER ARM and claimed it was a sawing accident. He was only looking at a $775,000 settlement . . . but was also busted after an investigation.

Both men are facing criminal charges…but...isn't losing your hands enough punishment?

Today Glover realized the Boston bomber's mom looks just like Weasel from 'Hey, Arnold!' See a comparison on today's blog pics.

Posted By: Max Foizey  

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