Woody Allen Stammers For 45 Minutes, Colbert's GOP Celeb Squad, & the Top Interesting Facts About Passover
Posted 3/27/2013 3:00:00 PM

Here’s a pretty funny bit from the Colbert Report about the GOP’s plans to appeal to a younger demographic.

In honor of the major Jewish spring festival that commemorates the liberation of the Israelites from Egyptian bondage over 3,300 years ago . . . here are the Top Interesting Facts About Passover.

It is one of the two most widely observed Jewish traditions. The other is running Hollywood.

It affects nobody in the NBA. It's Yiddish for "Not as cool as Easter."

It was named after what Tim Tebow does to NFL receivers.

Sooner or later, Adam Sandler will turn it into another annoying novelty song.

The holiday commemorates the Israelites being emancipated from slavery in ancient Egypt. And since that day, the Jews have had nothing but EASY LIVING!

Sure, the traditional matzah eaten at Passover may look like cardboard. But it's nowhere near as flavorful.

The first two nights are marked by traditional family dinners.

The other five are marked by relentless nagging from your mother about why you still haven't met a nice doctor and settled down.

Americans continue to be befuddled by a spring holiday that focuses on preserving sacred traditions, rather than watching the NCAA tournament while gorging themselves on Cadbury eggs.

The celebration goes on for eight days. So, in some ways, it feels a lot like watching a Gerard Butler movie.

Like any holiday spent with family, it's best to spend all of it drunk.

For some reason, "The Huffington Post" put together a montage of every time WOODY ALLEN has stammered or tripped over his words in a movie.

And since he pretty much ALWAYS stammers, the montage is 44 minutes long.

Enjoy(?)

Posted By: Max Foizey  

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