Signs You Shouldn't Have Kids, A Dad Rap, & the Craziest Video You Will Ever See
11/30/2012 3:00:00 PM
Check out the pic on today's blog of Mark Klose (now) standing next to a blown-up photo of Mark Klose (then) in his KWK days.
This is pretty cool, starting today and running for one week only, Plaza Frontenac will be showing films from Studio Ghibli. Here’s the schedule:
Fri, Nov 30: Nausicaa of the Valley of the Wind (1984) at 11:00am, 1:30 and 7:00pm / Fri, Nov 30: Howl's Moving Castle (2004) in English: 4:00 and 9:30pm
Sat, Dec 1: Spirited Away (2001) at 11:00am, 1:30, 7:00pm / Sat, Dec 1: Kiki's Delivery Service (1989) at 4:15 and 9:30pm
Sun, Dec 2: My Neighbor Totoro (1988) at 11:45am, 1:45 and 7:00pm / Sun, Dec 2: Castle in the Sky (1986) at 4:00 and 9:00pm
Mon, Dec 3: Ponyo (2008) in English: 1:45 and 7:00pm / Mon, Dec 3: Porco Rosso (1992) at 4:15 and 9:15pm
Tue, Dec 4: Pom Poko (1994) at 1:30 and 7:00pm / Tue, Dec 4: My Neighbors the Yamadas (1999) at 4:00 and 9:30pm
Wed, Dec 5: The Cat Returns (2002) in English: 1:45 and 7:00pm / Wed, Dec 5: Whisper of the Heart (1995) at 4:00 and 9:00pm
Thu, Dec 6: Princess Mononoke (1997) at 11:00am, 1:45 and 7:00pm / Thu, Dec 6: Only Yesterday (1991) at 4:30 and 9:45pm
For more info go HERE.
There's an EPIC video on YouTube called "Get Your Daddy On", where a dad RAPS about all the things you have to do to be a good husband and father. According to the song, it involves a lot of cooking, cleaning, and listening...and absolutely NO time learning how to keep a beat.
The best thing about that video is once his wife divorces him she can say “Yeah, he’s my ex.” Worried you might end up with a Rappin’ Daddy? Before you decided to procreate . . . you might want to first answer the Top Questions to Ask Yourself Before Having Kids.
Would you find it demeaning to wipe the butt of an ungrateful person who drains you of your youth, money and energy?
Do you enjoy having perky, full breasts? If yes, you're making a mistake, sweetie.
Do your kitchen cupboards fit 4,397 boxes of Cheerios?
Are you cool with outfitting your toilet with a plastic clamp you won't be able to open at 3:00 A.M. when you really gotta pee?
At what point did you give up on life? (Hint: Now.)
Do you have a finished basement the child will be able to move into after you blow $200,000 on his college education?
Are you ready to be a grandparent in sixteen years?
If a person flings oatmeal into your face for no reason, do you: A.) Laugh. B.) Beat the crap out of them. If B.), Do not proceed.
Can you transition from saying the f-word to "fudge" in the middle of enunciating it?
Can you handle the spare room where you look at porn and smoke weed becoming a nursery?
Even though your cable box gets 999 channels, are you prepared for it to remain on PBS Kids Sprout?
Are you prepared to have crushes on kid's show hosts? (I’m looking at YOU, Kelly Vrooman!)
When you trade in your Accord for a minivan, does your soul go with it?
Do you have the strength to watch every Pixar movie ever made seven times a day?
Is there really such a thing as a Wiggles-induced coma? Is 18 years too long to go without FUN?
Is your immune system strong enough to battle whatever you might pick up in the Chuck E. Cheese ball pit?
Is getting peed on as fun when you're not paying a dominatrix $300 an hour to do it?
Once your folks stop nagging you about when they're going to be grandparents, will you have anything left to talk about?
Do you think your child will bring positive change to America's future . . . or will it be like you?
Do you like having a dog? Because it's nothing like that.
Would you be happy taking all the money you have right now, halving it, and then not having either half?
Are you fond of saying, "Where did it all go wrong?"
Are you a happy, easygoing person? And are you willing to never be that way again?
Do you like being awake all night while NOT being high on meth?
Aw, just kidding. Go ahead and have kids! And then babysit mine.
OK, BIG WARNING here before the next video. It’s FULL of f-bombs and general craziness.
It's a woman and her mom in Mount Vernon, Illinois, responding to haters on the Internet . . . which is pointless. But they're both REALLY angry about it.
In under four minutes you find out all kind of things, including that the woman is, quote, "not fake," that she WAS TOO born in 1986, that her hair is NOT a wig, and that her mom . . . who's in the background HICCUPPING through the whole thing . . . DOES in fact wear bras.
Then her mom PROVES it by flashing the camera. There's also some depressing stuff about dead family members that WOULD make you feel guilty for laughing, if the video wasn't so ridiculous.
DOUBLE WARNING: There's a LOT of profanity, including the F-word, S-word, and a few racist "monkey" comments from the mom.
I’m not sure I’m even alive right now.