Whiplash the Cowboy Monkey
9/26/2012 3:00:00 PM
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Nothing makes Tom laugh more than animals wearing people clothes or doing people things. Case in point: Whiplash the Cowboy Monkey.
I don’t really get why that’s so funny, but I guess I’m in the minority. Maybe the world would be a better place if we all laughed at simple stuff like that.
The world would also probably be a better place if we all showed up early or on time. But since that's not going to happen . . . how late can you be and still get away with it? I’ve always thought you’re not late as long as you show up within ten minutes of the agreed upon time.
Well a new survey by Timex asked people how late you can be to work, a date, an interview, or a family event without being considered late. And here's what they found . . .
*Work. The average person says as long as you're less than FOUR MINUTES late you can get away with it. But 64% of people say they're NEVER late to work.
*First date. Anything under four-and-a-half minutes late won't be considered late.
*Interview. This is the one where they're REALLY judging. The average person said you can get away with being two minutes late.
*Family event. Who cares about being on time to THIS, right? We're all horrible people. The average person said your mom won't be upset you're late as long as you get there within 13-and-a-half minutes of the starting time.
I don’t order fast food often, but when I do I usually order burgers plain (cheese only, natch) and they usually give me a burger with everything on it anyway. So I scrape stuff off and eat it anyway.
You might have heard earlier this year two men in Tennessee were arrested after they trashed a McDonald's for not putting enough tiny onions on their cheeseburgers. And now we've got ANOTHER crime connected to McDonald's onions. People need to STOP or the government's going to overstep its bounds and ban them.
On Sunday, 50-year-old Jayme John Leon of Gresham, Oregon went to a McDonald's and ordered a quarter pounder with no onions. But they gave him onions anyway. So he DEMANDED a refund. Well . . . sort of.
First he ate the burger anyway, THEN he demanded the refund. The store told him they wouldn't give him his money back since, ya know, he'd eaten the entire burger.
So he proceeded to throw his soda in the manager's face, break some glass, and SMASH a cash register. He was arrested for first-degree criminal mischief, second-degree disorderly conduct, and harassment.
Maybe next time he will stop and chill out, like this cigarette smoking monkey.